Before we dive in to this week’s revoltin’ reviews, I’d like to call attention to a fright flick exploding (quite literally) onto yer TV screens from those diabolical dudes at Necrostorm titled THE MILDEW FROM PLANET XONADER! Now I worked on this flick, and I am damn proud of the outcome, so I really want to give ya taste of what the whole shebang is all about!

Some of you more astute creeps may remember I’ve talked about this film here before, but now I’ve had the chance to lay my putrid peepers on it, and I can assure you it’s an ultra-gory good time (and not just because my alter-ego provides some vicious voices for the goings-on).

The story goes a lil’ somethin’ like this: deep within the bowels of a top-secret research facility, scientists have been conducting experiments with a rapid-spread mildew capable of ruining stockpiles of a rival army’s food. Before you can say “what could go wrong?” the spores are ravaging the facility, turning everyone into rampaging monsters. That’s when a mercenary named Toxic makes the scene and all hell really starts to break loose!

The best way I can sum up the vibe of ol’ MILDEW is by saying, “Imagine if STREET TRASH and a 50s era Sci-Fi such as THE THING FROM ANOTHER WORLD got all sloshed up in a blender into some sort of cacophonous cocktail.” It’s dodgy science, body-melts, face smashing bad-asses, and gallons upon gallons of gore!

If all of that appeals to ya, you can order the flick right here! Tell ‘em XIII sent ya!

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MAGNETIC

•             RELEASE DATE: Available Exclusively on Steam
•             WRITTEN BY: Sophia Cacciola, Michael J. Epstein
•             DIRECTED BY: Sophia Cacciola, Michael J. Epstein
•             STARRING: Allix Mortis, Chris Bernardi, Rachel Leah Blumenthal

“Holy hell, what was that?!!” That is what I said after viewing MAGNETIC, a film from the fangtastic duo Sophia Cacciola and Michael J. Epstein, the crazy cats behind ultra-entertaining vampire rompBLOOD OF THE TRIBADES. I really can’t wait to lay this one on ya, my creeps…

The best way I can get you into the mindset of MAGNETIC is to say, what if instead of Lewis Carroll, 80s-era Gary Numan wrote Alice in Wonderland on an absinthe binge while covered in magnetic tape surrounded by a complete run of Jack Kirby’s 2001 comics. Sounds strange, right? Well, the movie is 100 times more insane, in the most f’n glorious way possible!

Check out the synopsis to get a hint of what I mean. Lookin’ for a fresh start, Alice (Mortis) returns to her bucolic hometown and takes a job in an office located hundreds of feet below a barn surrounded by sheep. Each day she must follow a list of cryptic commands and perform the duty of calling folks and informing them of the death of their loved ones, day in and day out. Before long she begins receiving messages that all is not as it seems, which brings her in contact with a cult of black clad women that worship Ra. Sound strange? Well I haven’t even mentioned the apocalyptic solar event threatening the planet, Alice’s dreams of spider women and animal-headed beings, and wonky goings-on in the fabric of space and time!

MAGNETIC is what low budget genre film making should be; unique, challenging, and overflowing with big ideas, money limitations be damned. For the same cost as your now bog-standard 80s slasher throwback, these folks have created an entire world unto its own, populated by bizarre characters, a near fetishistic infatuation with outdated technology, and rad concepts the likes of which you have never seen before (with a tip of the hat to the aforementioned Mr. Carroll).

I simply cannot recommend MAGNETIC enough!

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